May 2, 2021

How to Manage Gray Curly Hair

Is your hair starting to go gray in certain areas, or are you looking to transition to fully gray, natural hair? Today I’m sharing tips for taking care of gray curly hair, some of the common causes, and how to hide gray hairs if you’re not wanting to embrace them.

I am 28 years old, and already starting to get gray hairs. I started seeing random grays pop in when I was about 25 years old, and now they’ve become more populated in one area near my temples and just now started popping up on the other side as well. Most people start to get gray hairs in their 30s, with age 35 being the most common. Going gray pre-maturely can be purely genetic, but there are a few other causes to consider. Mine is genetics because my sister also started getting grays in her 20s, and she is now in her mid-30s.

Causes of Gray Hair

Age
Genetics
Stress
Improper diet and vitamin deficiencies: Vitamin B12, iron, iodine
Medical conditions such as a thyroid disorder
Chemical exposure or toxins

So what happens when our hair goes gray?

When our bodies slowly stop producing melanin (natural pigment), hair follicles will produce gray hairs. Existing hairs do not turn gray, rather new hairs that grow in will be gray. There is no way to reverse the graying process. Gray hairs can be maintained and dyed.

Higher Porosity

The cuticle also can get thinner as we age and gray, causing our hair to become high porosity. Porosity refers to the ability of our hair to absorb and retain moisture. Our hair’s cuticle raises and lowers as the hair swells with water. A healthy, functioning cuticle allows water and holds it in, preventing the hair from drying out.

Coarser Texture

Gray hair can tend to be more coarse in texture, which can result in a brittle, rough, dry feeling. Coarse hairs can also tangle easily, especially if you also have kinks in your hair (small bends where the strand changes width and direction). These small kinks can cause tangles and friction.

Dryness

Our scalps also produce less sebum (oil) as we age. Oil lubricates the hair, so without as much of it being produced naturally, gray hair can become dry quickly. Coarse textures also tend to feel more dry and brittle when not properly moisturized.

How to Manage Gray Curls

Don’t pluck them! This can put stress on the hair follicles and lead to thinning.
Give the gray hairs time to grow out. At first, they will be short and stick out, but as they get longer they will blend into your curls and start to actually form a ringlet or wave. Usually, they look straight at the root when first coming in.
Moisture is key! Focus on keeping the hair moisturized. Deep condition weekly and use a heated cap if needed, or put on a shower cap to trap the heat from your head and increase absorption. Use a leave-in conditioner and/or cream first, then seal with a gel or a mousse. Using only a gel or mousse can cause your hair to feel dry.
Avoid harsh surfactant ingredients like Sodium Laureth, Myreth, Lauryl Sulfate, or Ammonium Lauryl and Laureth Sulfate
Use protein with caution. Too much protein can build up on coarse hair, causing it to feel more brittle. Coarse hairs have enough structure and don’t usually need much protein. I recommend deep conditioning with protein once a month, and maybe use protein in one of your stylers or alternate routines. Avoid using a lot of protein products back-to-back.
Use a pre-poo oil to provide slip when dry detangling, and reduce friction when shampooing. Learn more here.
Use more water in gray areas when applying stylers.
Use styling products with a lot of slip. Look for ingredients such as:
- Slippery elm extract
- Flaxseed
- Marshmallow root extract
- Stearyl alcohol
- Oils & butters
Avoid high, direct heat. Diffuse with warm or cool air.

Brassy Gray Hairs

If you have hard water in your home, this can cause your gray hair to appear brassy or orange in color if you are fully gray. This is the same thing that can happen to blonde hair. Get a filtered showerhead or install a water softener system if needed. To clarify your hair and remove hard water build-up, look for shampoos that contain:

Disodium EDTA
Tetrasodium EDTA
Pentasoidum Pentetate
Sodium gluconate
Sodium phytate

Another option is a purple shampoo. Many blondes like using purple shampoo every so often to counteract the brassy tones in the hair.

How to Hide Gray Hairs

Adjust your part if the grays are concentrated in one area.
Use a brush when styling to blend gray hairs into curl clumps. This technique is also great when refreshing.
Wear various hairstyles using bobby pins, hair clips, etc. that conceal gray areas if desired.
Use washable hair “makeup”
- Root cover-up sprays (I can’t find a silicone-free option, please let me know if you know of one)
- Hair mascaras
- Eyeshadow or root touch-up powder that matches your hair color
Dye hair to fully cover grays
- Semi-permanent hair dyes do not contain ammonia and are safer for curls because they simply deposit color. They fade in 6-12 shampoos on average.
- Demi-permanent hair dyes last longer and contain a higher concentration of hydrogen peroxide to open the hair cuticle.
- Permanent hair dye contains ammonia and lifts the hair’s cuticle, altering the pigment in the inner structure of the hair.
- Be careful when dying gray hairs at home, because gray hair will take dye differently than regular hair.

Embrace the Gray

Your curls are beautiful whether you decide to let your grays be free or if you decide to dye them or conceal them! Personally, I’m leaving mine as is for now and just blending them into my curls using the parting brush techniques above. Perhaps one day when they really take over, I’ll look into semi-permanent or demi-permanent hair dyes. I’ve worked so hard over the past 4 years to “transition” to my natural hair texture and color, so I’m trying to keep my virgin hair as long as possible.

What do you plan to do with your gray curls? Let me know in the comments!